How to Deal with Imposter Syndrome
image courtesy of www.shillingtoneducation.comAs graduation season is upon us, I felt like it would be important to talk about how impactful such a transition must be. First, if you have recently graduated from high school, college, graduate school, or any other level of education, congratulations! You have worked hard in completing this level of education and you deserve recognition for achieving such a milestone! That alone should not go unnoticed. It is common for those right before graduation or shortly after graduation to experience feelings of Imposter Syndrome as the shift in focus on their next stage in life begins.
Before talking about what to do with Imposter Syndrome, it is important to learn and understand what this psychological phenomenon is and is not. Imposter Syndrome is not a diagnosable mental illness. From what I’ve gathered, Imposter Syndrome is this feeling of inadequacy and self-doubt in one’s own ability. Ironically, it appears when any sort of notable achievement takes place. It can leave one thinking that they were just lucky to be where they are now, and that they’re really a fraud who’s bound to be revealed.
It’s a really scary thing if you really think about it. The fear of potentially being exposed as a fraud, and even worse if you’re called out on it! Imposter Syndrome can lead to increased anxiety, strained self-esteem, and possibly depression. It can also set up a vicious cycle of negative self-talk and removing any possible joy in your own progress or achievements.
“How could you even achieve this anyways? You don’t know anything! You’re just a phony!”
Scary stuff.
One thing I can tell you to reassure those who might be experiencing Imposter Syndrome is the old timey saying “comparison is the thief of joy”. When experiencing Imposter Syndrome, it’s very easy to compare yourself to others by your definition of “smart” or “successful”. However, my point is that when comparing ourselves to others, we’re literally giving ourselves a distorted view of our own skills and experiences, which then can easily allow Imposter Syndrome to creep in.
Ask yourself this: In your own eyes, what does “success” look like? What does “good enough” look like? You might be surprised by your own answer.
Another thing I can recommend (as always) is talk to a professional or a trusted person about your feelings about Imposter Syndrome. This can offer guidance and support in these times, in addition to serving as a reminder that you’re not alone in how you feel. You’re human. It’s reassuring to know that there are others who may feel this way and that we’re not alone in this. Verbalizing our feelings and fears might also help us stop with the self-comparison. We can’t all be imposters, right?
Back in the beginning, I mentioned that Imposter Syndrome often occurs during a big or notable achievement. It wasn’t just luck. You worked hard to get to where you are now. Especially during graduation season, I recommend looking at things such as recommendation letters, your old report card, and perhaps your resume to help combat these feelings. These aren’t lies on paper; you’ve lived through these experiences and have earned actual accomplishments. You can’t fake that.
This brings me to my last point. As we embark on the next stage in our lives after completing the previous one, it’s okay to not know what you’re doing at the moment. We all have to start somewhere. You will make mistakes in the beginning, and might be called out on that. Let’s give ourselves some grace. The things we fear being exposed to the world may actually be the things that make us authentic and real. Not everyone is naturally good at everything, but with practice and continued experience, we will get to where we need to be.
As always, if you got this far on my blog, thank you so much for the time you took to read it! I’ll admit, this was very therapeutic for me to write. I hope reading it gave you some positive insight into this joyous graduation time. Congratulations to this year’s graduating class! 🥳
-Kimberly Rivera, LPC